Here he is with the latest on his BPFL title hopes, last week’s best and unluckiest performers, and his recent move to Tums E-X:
We are back from the last international break of the year, and hopefully all of your players returned healthy.
Before the last Gameweek, I was concerned about my two incoming transfers, Robin van Persie and Rafael van der Vaart, who have a habit of getting hurt during their international forays. Spending a lot of money on these two for just one week would not have helped the ulcer I have been developing as of late.
Sure enough, RVDV was injured in the Netherlands’ first match, but it appears that he has recovered sufficiently to face Aston Villa on Monday. Fortunately, RVP was rested for the second match, and the Rolaids were shelved for another week. (Though now the site has just listed RVDV as doubtful. Pass the Tums!)
Speaking of gastro-intestinal medicine, if you have stock in any of the companies that make these products, you may have noticed a spike in their dividends recently. That was me. You’re welcome. After sailing through the first seven weeks undefeated, I have now lost three in a row.
It got so bad, I even tried to change my team name to the SS Titanic, but the site would not allow it. Hopefully I can turn things around quickly, and I am banking on the above-mentioned Dutchmen playing a big role. Sitting 7 points behind leader coloradokeeper, the only unbeaten team remaining, I have my work cut out for me. But a head-to-head meeting next week represents a huge opportunity to gain ground. Putting him in his place would be enjoyable as well!
Matches of the Upcoming Week: Coloradokeeper will be looking to keep his unbeaten run going, but this week he travels to Herk City, winners of six of their last seven, and just four points behind the leader. The other match of note has DisgruntledNumpties hosting Sleeping Giant. This match goes beyond just wins and losses, with pride and bragging rights the real prizes at stake. [Co-commissioner Our Man at the Valley manages the Numpties, and we are Sleeping Giant. Let’s just say we’ve hit the snooze button for the last time!—Ed.]
Performance of the Week: DisgruntledNumpties was the big winner with an 81-point haul. Captain Robin van Persie led the way with 22 points, followed by Chris Eagles’ 15, Stephen Ward’s 10 and youngster Jack Rodwell’s 9. Nani and Laurent Koscielny added 7 and 6 points, respectively, as my co-commissioner got the full worth of his wildcard. Time will tell if he has played it too early.
Unlucky Loser: We might have to rename this award in honor of EPL Quakes, as that team has won it in two of the past three weeks. Last week’s 62-point total was good enough to beat 33 other teams—but not the Quakes’ opponent, Bryan O4 Leverkusen. Turns out the frustration might cause a shakeup. Reached at their training ground, EPLQ’s manager said, “Maybe I should take ‘Quakes’ out of my name. [San Jose Earthquakes coach] Frank Yallop is always saying how “we should’ve won that one.”
Thanks, MGlo. Good luck, everyone, and don’t forget to set your lineups tonight.